Show notes
Can you lead other people if you can't lead yourself first?
Dr. Mike Bolton has spent over 25 years in ministry as a pastor and college instructor, and today works as a leadership coach, executive advisor, and board member for organizations around the world. In this conversation, he breaks down what actually separates a real leader from someone who just wants the title, starting with a question most people never ask themselves before chasing a promotion.
Mike walks through the litmus test he uses for leadership: not how many people you manage, but whether you can lead your own life first, your faith, your health, your relationships, your finances. He shares the story of a real turning point in his 42 year marriage, a moment he describes as a directive from God to stop holding his wife Debbie back from who she was created to be. He also gets honest about a night early in his parenting when he broke a chair and put a hole in the wall, the three question process he now uses to get underneath his own anger, and why he had to forgive his father, an active alcoholic throughout Mike's childhood, before he could lead his own family well.
We also get into what Mike learned watching his longtime mentor John Maxwell up close for over 25 years, the difference between servant leadership and control, why most men have never actually seen real leadership modeled at home, and how to have a difficult conversation with someone and still walk away with them liking you.
🔹 THE LITMUS TEST — Why leading yourself always comes before leading anyone else
🔹 THE MARRIAGE SHIFT — The moment 15 years into his marriage that changed everything
🔹 THE THREE QUESTIONS — Mike's process for figuring out what's really underneath his anger
🔹 THE MENTOR — What 25 years of watching John Maxwell up close actually taught him
🔹 THE FOUR PILLARS — Faith, family, friendships, and meaningful work, the checklist Mike still uses today
This isn't a leadership theory episode. It's a case for dealing with your own baggage first, because the people watching you, at work and at home, will follow what you actually do long before they follow what you say.
⏱️ What's Inside:
0:00 – Why leadership looks appealing from a distance
1:00 – Introducing Dr. Mike Bolton
2:02 – Why does leadership look so sexy?
3:05 – What true servant leadership looks like
4:34 – The litmus test: can you lead yourself first?
6:35 – Mike's early struggle with being a people pleaser
9:14 – How to have a difficult conversation and still be liked
16:24 – The marriage shift 15 years in
19:02 – Why most men never see real leadership modeled
21:53 – Evaluating who you let mentor you
33:04 – Arthur Brooks' four pillars of happiness
44:18 – Mike's three question process for anger
51:44 – Book recommendations for growing as a leader
52:48 – The upcoming Live2Lead event in Red Deer and Sylvan Lake
53:26 – What happiness looks like to Mike today
## Connect with Dr. Mike Bolton
Website → liferekindled.com
Instagram → instagram.com/life_rekindled
Books → Search "Mike Bolton" on Amazon, including Ignite Your Mission
Money isn't the main currency of a good life. This podcast gives you the tools to build a life of meaning and fulfillment.
Free Ultimate Goal Setting Framework → thecurrencyofhappiness.com
Subscribe on YouTube → youtube.com/@thecurrencyofhappiness
Instagram → instagram.com/thecurrencyofhappiness
Listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts → Search "The Currency of Happiness"
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#Leadership #ServantLeadership #Marriage #ChristianPodcast #FaithAndFamily #Mentorship #PersonalGrowth #JohnMaxwell #ExecutiveCoaching #TheCurrencyOfHappiness